Plowin' through shit tests

I try to avoid talking about game with girls because they uniformly react negatively to it. They abhor the tactical aspect because it’s the antithesis of romance I suppose. But without it we are left with ineffective platitudes like the universally retarded advice “Just be yourself”. Uh, thanks but “being myself” has gotten me a gold medal in chronic masturbating, you have any other nuggets of wisdom Dr. Phil?

The reason guys can’t just be themselves or just walk up and say “hi” (as is often suggested by my well-meaning but clueless girl-friends) is because we know the consequences. Case in point……

I’m out the night before Thanksgiving and things are dead except for one local bar which is hopin’. I spy with my eye a 2 set and open….

X: Hey, you guys look interesting, are you friendly?
HBBrunette: No (I think I got a negative response because in order to get to them I had to get way into their space)
X: Sweet, me neither, I’m kind of a dick actually but we can be bitter together tonight. Hey, I have a question for you….how often do you get approached in a place like this? (this is my standard opener)
HBBarracuda: Never
X: Interesting…we were at dinner with our girfriends and they were saying –
HBBarracuda: Why are you talking to us if you have a girlfriend?
X: *Pause* Female friends if you want to be particular
HBBrunette: I think it’s ok
X: So yeah we hardly ever see guys approach girls anymore, we mostly just -
HBBarracuda: Are we on camera?
X: .Yes it’s right there, smile. Yeah sometimes you’ll see guys send in a scout to try to pick up -
HBBarracuda: I don’t know what you are talking about
X: *looking at her drink* How many of those have you had?
HBBarracuda: This is my first
X: Anyway, what I was saying was -
HBBarracuda: Are you here by yourself?
X: Yes, I live in the bar and I come out at night to entertain people
HBBarracuda: You aren’t doing a very good job.
X: (laughing but stumbling a little)….
HBBrunette: You caught us at a bad time…we haven’t seen each other in 5 years and we’re catching up tonight.

I fluff talk for another minute or so before getting the “well it was nice to meet you” blowout from the brunette.

X: Ok have a good night you guys
HBBarracuda: You too…and take care of those pearly whites. *smiles*

So a couple of things…one, as I said, this is a frequent response to most guys just walking up to a group of girls so I hope my female readers understand why we guys are apt to employ some kind of gameplan. Luckily I almost never get this because my body language / non-verbal communication is usually better. Secondly, notice how quickly the girls turned as I passed their shit tests. The brunette did a 180 almost immediately as I ignored her initial rejection and HBBarracuda (who was probably a 9…beautiful blonde with really big boobs…if you are into such things..hehe) gave me a nice compliment / IOI on my smile as I ejected. I think if I didn’t stumble on the “You aren’t doing a very good job” line I would have had them (the correct response would have been “It gets a lot worse, stick around” Credit: Sinn)

We also got the “Are we on camera?” line a few times throughout the night. Stupid reality show….

X